Reliving the Heartache

The holiday season has been a tough one for me.  Each day seems to be a reminder of what happened last year at this time and so much of that time was heart wrenching for me.  When everybody is celebrating the holidays with their families, I am reminded anew of the loss of Tyler and the giant space he filled in my life.

For me, New Year's Day was the start of the end.  Tyler had been getting daily transfusions of platelets since we got home from Houston, but couldn't seem to hold on to them at all.  They finally determined that he might be bleeding some internally (after seeing his hand swollen to 3 times its normal size) and prescribed a medication that he could take to slow down any internal leakage.  It actually seemed to be making a difference.

The doctors had already mentioned hospice to us and we were moving in the direction.  Tyler was very firm that he did not want to die in the hospital.  He'd already spent too much of his life there.  So when he spiked a fever on New Year's Day, he begged me not to call the doctors and report it.  We both knew that if I did, they would tell us that he needed to come into the hospital.

I did the best that I could to keep an eye on his fever overnight and urge him to drink water, but I didn't know that the reason they admitted him to the hospital at any sign of a fever was to get IV fluids into him and watch his blood pressure.  By morning, Tyler's blood pressure had fallen so low that he could barely walk and wasn't really cognizant of what was happening.  I was bustling around downstairs, packing a bag of stuff to get through the day, and waiting for him to come downstairs.  I finally ran upstairs to check on him and he was sitting on the bed in the dark, confused about what he was supposed to be doing.

The nurses were very concerned with his condition when I got him into SCCA.  They immediately started IV fluids at as high a rate as they could.  I called his dad and his mom and suggested that they come.  I was worried that he was going to die that very day and they wouldn't get a chance to say goodbye.

The doctors and nurses were urging Tyler to go to the hospital.  Based on his wishes, I kept saying no that Tyler did not want to go to the hospital.  Eventually though, I think they wore him down with their arguments and he agreed to go.  An ambulance took him from SCCA to UW and we moved into the ICU so that he could be closely monitored.

I'm thankful that he was awake for about a day and a half in the hospital and a couple of people did get to see him before he fell into his coma, but it was sure hard to not to have him there and awake for the last few days.  I have missed him greatly this year, but hope that he continues to watch over me and care for me.

With great sadness, I bid farewell to 2011.  In so many ways, it has been the most difficult year of my life.  People occasionally tell me that think I am strong from what they have observed of my walk in grief.  Please don't be misled by the fact that I am often private with my hurts and loneliness.  I would give absolutely everything I own or could hope to own to have Tyler back beside me and healthy.  I suspect, from the generous contributions my LLS fundraising has received, that many of you would chip in to help me if we could.

The best that I can do at this point is try to honor Tyler in the life I lead going forward, to put forth efforts to fight against the cancer that stole him away from us, and to remember that I was dearly loved by a great man.  I hope that some of you will take a fond memory into 2012 and think of Tyler in his "Love Life" t-shirt, quoting stats for any sport we wanted.  He would want each of us to make the most of our time together.

Live Every Moment!

Upcoming Fundraising Swap -- Everyone is invited!

I'm hosting my next Fundraising Swap on January 14th and wanted to invite you to join me!  If you've never been to a Swap, here is how it goes:

1) You bring a minimum donation of $15 payable to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society or pay online in advance at http://bledsoebattle.com

2) Bring a bag (or two, or three) of all the media items that you don't know what to do with.  Please bring your items in good condition to share. Suggested items are: books, magazines, CD's, DVD's tapes, video games, records, computer games, etc.

3) We set out our goodies for everyone to shop through... one person's trash is another one's treasure. Take what you want, leave what you don't.

4) Show off your great bargains!  A $15 donation is a great deal for all of the great new items I have collected at previous swaps.

All of the proceeds are going to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  Any items unclaimed at the end of the swap will be consigned to raise money for LLS or donated.

If you can not attend but still want to help, please feel free to make a donation of any media items or cash!  If you are able to attend, contact me for the rest of the details!  I hope to see you there.

Breaking the 1 Hour Barrier

This next week's long run will break the 1 hour run barrier for me, but I am feeling good about continuing to run longer and longer times each week. It has been rewarding to get out and do something positive a few nights (and one early morning) each week. I'm certainly not perfect in my training, but I am running almost regularly according to my schedule.  If you want to follow my progress in running and/or fundraising, you can visit my Madrid website at http://bledsoebattle.com

The training is all based on time of the run, rather than distance, which is much easier for me to track. Some days I run at a faster pace than others and cover more distance; some days I just don't feel up to pushing hard. I'm hovering around a pace that would be put me at a 5-6 hour finish for the marathon. I would really like to bump up my speed a bit so that I can finish in under 5 hours.

We are also approaching the 1 year anniversary of Tyler's death, so I am also reminded of many things from my life with him. Last Christmas we were in Houston until late on Christmas Even, when Tyler was released to fly home. I think the doctors knew that he was dying and were trying to help us get home so that we could be with our families.

One of the fundraising options that we have is to get a personal sponsorship to put someone's name actually on our jersey for race day. I have been thinking that it would be really special to do that in Tyler's memory. If you have someone special that you want to have named on my jersey, a $1000 donation can make it happen.

Thanks to my supporters for this great start! I have hit 1/4 of the way to my goal (even though some of the donations are still in the mail and not visible on my website yet). I have been selling my handmade greeting cards at work to raise money and would be happy to connect with others that want a few cards to send out. $2/card adds up and will go a long way towards fighting blood cancers!

Thanks again for all of the encouragement and support!

Huskies or Cougars?

I was invited to participate in a Team in Training (TNT) fundraiser over the long weekend and decided that it would be a great way to kick off my newest round of fundraising.  Now that I have reached my goal of raising $10,000 for the 2011 Light the Night walk, I have turned my attention to the work needed to get to the Madrid Marathon.

While my running practice is important (and I just started my 3rd week of regular training), Team in Training sets goals for us to make certain that the costs to send us to our event is never more than 25% of the amount I earn for LLS.  When I was invited to sell beads at the Apple Cup pregame, I decided to join in with 6 other ladies from this season's marathon group and sell my little heart out.

When all was said and done, we had raised almost $2500 from the generous Cougar and Husky fans in downtown Seattle.  Apparently, they could all agree that fighting cancer was a good cause (even if they couldn't agree on which team deserved to win more that day).

Each of us earned $325 for our races in one afternoon.  Thanks to the many supporters who helped us hit such a lofty amount and to the survivors I met during the day who reminded me of why I decided to keep fighting against cancers.

If you want to donate to my marathon fundraising, you can find my marathon page at http://pages.teamintraining.org/wa/madrid12/abledsomp0

Also, keep your eyes out for announcements of upcoming fundraisers.  I have a couple of swaps planned for January and February and would love to have both donations and shoppers!

Light the Night Awards ceremony

I was invited to a lovely evening at Theo Chocolates for the 2011 Light the Night awards ceremony.  Several members of Tyler's family were able to join me there, enjoying appetizers and wine and delicious chocolate.

After mingling for a while, they finally announced the individual and team totals for the year.  They started at the 10th place team and worked their way up to the top team for the year.

Drum roll please...

We won the first Tyler Bledsoe Memorial Award and will have our name forever engraved on a plaque honoring him.

 

Team Firefly had some amazing fundraising this year! We had double the next highest team with over $26,000 raised to fight cancer.   Thank you so much to everyone on the team that helped us capture this honor.  Despite the fact that Tyler wasn't there in person this year, I truly believe that a legacy has been created to honor him.

Way to go, from everyone who walked and helped with fundraising to the many donors that helped us get here! I certainly couldn't have done this on my own and I am so very thankful to everyone who helped me along the way.

Thank you all!!!

 

Happy Birthday, Tyler

My darling husband was born on Halloween, 45 years ago.  It was impossible not to spend time thinking about him today and yet I am not sure what to say.  I miss him.  He was such a great husband to me and friend to all that knew him.  I miss having him at home at the end of the day.  I miss him helping me keep my busy-ness in check.  I miss being able to cook dinner for him.  Fantasy football isn't the same without his addiction to statistics and his constant need to share the latest stat with me...  That barely scratches the surface, but I'm sad that we have to go on without him in our midst.

One of the things that bothers me is just how young he was when he died.  I guess they tell the truth when they say that cancer is equal opportunity.  I truly hope that we see a change in that during my lifetime.

Volunteers Needed with a Luau as a reward

The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society is hosting the Pineapple Classic on Saturday, November 12th.  They are in need of volunteers if anyone wants to see a fun event and finish the day off with an authentic Hawaiian Luau!  I hope to see you there!

This year’s event is on Saturday, November 12^th at the Mountain Meadows Farm in North Bend.  As you know, the Winter Pineapple Classic is a fun and festive 5k team adventure race where participants must navigate a series of obstacles and physical challenges.  The event concludes with an authentic Hawaiian Luau!

(Special note:  Volunteers will receive a free pass to the Luau and beer garden (21 and over) after completing their volunteer shift).

Here are Volunteer Opportunities for The Winter Pineapple Classic

November 11^th – At Road Runner Sports in Seattle

·         Pre-race Check-in – check in participants and give them packets.

November 12^th – Mountain Meadows Farm, North Bend

·         Information Booth & Media Escort – Help assist LLS staff in answering questions and escorting media when they arrive

·         Registration and Check-in Booth – hand out packets to participants and register new participants.

·         Wave Starter – gather participants according to start time using large placards. Walk teams to start line.

·         Finish Line – will remove timing chips from participants and hand out water.

·         Luau Ticket Sales – Sell Luau tickets and check wristbands for admission

·         Bouncy House – Need adults to monitor number of kids in bouncy house

·         Parking and Traffic Attendants – Need adults to assist venue attendants with parking control

·         The Green Team -  Make sure trash & recycling is placed in proper receptacles and help pick up trash

·         Course Monitors – Adults needed to make sure participants stay on course – we don’t want anyone to end up in Canada

·         Obstacle Monitors – Adults needed to ensure participants are completely obstacles safely

·         Food Tent – serve food (food handlers permit is required)

·         Beer Garden Bartenders – Help our Brewery serve beer (Must be 21 over and have bartending license)

·         Clean-up Crew – Help LLS staff clean up luau venue; we always need extra help  =)

·         Obstacle Course Tear Down Crew – this will be a physical task for you, but we will make it fun!

Please let Lauren Last ( (206) 957-4566 ) know what opportunities appeal to you and she would be happy to give you more details.

8GB iPod push

I'm ALMOST at my personal goal for the 2011 Light the Night walk, so I decided to see if I can get there with a little mini auction.  I was going to put an 8GB iPod Touch up for auction on eBay, but figured I should toss it out to my friends first.  Is anyone looking to purchase an iPod before the upcoming holidays?  This one is brand new and still in the unopened plastic case.  The SKU at Best Buy is 9225377 if you want to look it up.  It retails for $199.99 right now, but I will be donating the money from this sale to the LLS to try to hit my goal of $10,000 by the end of the month.

If you are interested, contact me.  I will consider all offers received between now and October 29th.

Also, purchases made at Amazon.com using the link to the left help us to raise money for the Bledsoe Battle as well.

Thanks for your continued support!



iPod details:
-----------------------------------
The most popular Apple iPod is now even better. Along with the revolutionary Multi-Touch interface and Wi-Fi Web browsing, the 8GB iPod touch now includes HD video recording, FaceTime camera and the highest resolution iPod screen ever. Plus, the new 8GB iPod touch Game Center enhances your game play. The 8GB iPod touch has a lithium-ion battery that lasts up to 40 hours with up to 7 hours of video playback. Store over 1,750 songs with your 8GB iPod touch and up to 10,000 digital photos or ten hours of video. The 8GB iPod touch also allows you to watch your favorite movies over and over again. Take your 8GB iPod touch to the gym or to the park. You'll never leave home without it.

Current 3rd- and 4th-generation iPod touch owners can receive a free software update to iOS 5 available through iTunes beginning October 12, 2011.

Product Features

• 8GB* internal flash memory stores up to 1,750 songs, up to 10,000 digital photos (iPod viewable photos transferred from iTunes), or up to 10 hours of video
• Multi-Touch interface, 3.5" widescreen display
• Built-in Wi-Fi lets you surf the Web, send e-mail, update your Facebook status, chat using AIM, and so much more (internet connection required)
• HD video recording
• Retina display - 4x pixels, 326 ppi, 24-bit color, LED

• Apple, the Apple logo and iTunes are trademarks of Apple Computer, Inc., registered in the U.S. and other countries. iPod is a trademark of Apple Computer, Inc.
• *Formatted capacity may vary. Results will vary based on file size and format, settings, features, software and other factors.

Taking the Next Step - Ole!

Yesterday morning, I agreed to do something that I never wanted to do. 

I've always liked running in races, but since I am not particularly good at training I like to keep my races to 5 miles or less (preferably less).  However, since the time that Tyler was diagnosed with Leukemia, I have been keeping my eye on the Team in Training (TNT) program offered by the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.  This is their most visible fundraising program and their most successful after 22 years of helping people of all ages and abilities to compete in amazing events.

Yesterday morning, I signed up to run my very first marathon next spring... in MADRID, Spain!  I will be training with the coaches from LLS and going to practices with the rest of the participants, but would love to have some of my friends and family join me.  If you have ever wanted to run a marathon, I'd like to invite you to join me in Madrid next April.  I figured that if I wanted to make a statement in Tyler's honor, I should go big and make it in Europe!

Tyler loved running and was a cross country athlete in his school days, so I figured that a marathon was the best TNT event for me to choose.  I never wanted to run that far (and still think that people that do might be crazy), but I am excited for my newest adventure!  If anyone wants to head out for a run over the next 6 months, feel free to invite me along.  I think I'm going to need all of the help that I can get with my training!

Light the Night 2011

This year's Light the Night walk was amazing!  We had approximately 100 team members there to honor Tyler and all of our honored heroes.

The Roddy kids made a sign that said Team Firefly and "We miss you Tyler"

Ceci, Erin (days before giving birth), and Mandy

Our Top Team tent

Team Check In with Becky, Debbie, and Charlotte

The Team Firefly tent with many of our team members waiting for the walk to start.

Hans, Alex, and Yanni  (There are 2 survivors in this picture!!!)

Hans, Yanni, and John

Bill, Charlotte, Debbie, and Loraine

Loraine and Bill

The walk start -- with my Tyler Tshirt

The walk start -- see those balloons already lighting things up?

Kate and Colleen

Our walk starting line and an abundance of balloons

One of the best parts of the walk is seeing the balloons parade around the block

My inspiration

Chris, Emily, Kate, and Sam